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Talking About The Taboo!

There are some stats that say 1 out of 6 boys have been or will be sexually abused. This is such a tragic statistic and what it tells me is that not only are there a lot of boys who have been abused and hurt, but that they grew or will grow into men who are still hurting and in pain from such a sick violation. Most men never saying a word about it, just suffering in silence. The tragedy in this is multilayered. Lots of people, especially men, dismiss it as something that happened, not really knowing that the effects are far-reaching. The effects from childhood molestation can cast a net that will affect you and everyone you love for the rest of your lives if not addressed. I know that this is difficult to talk about or even acknowledge, especially for men. That's why I am so happy that Dr. Howard Fradkin has written a book called Joining Forces to help men who are adult survivors learn to cope, deal and most of all stop suffering in silence.

Most of you reading this are not male... I know that because most of my audience is women :-) I know some of you are saying, "why is this important to me?" Well I'll tell you. I can assure you, his abuse can directly affect his relationship with you. It is such a cycle and this book is what can help to apply the brakes to stop the spinning. If you know of a male who has been sexually abused, this book is a must read in helping you understand him. If you suspect it or not, most of the telltale signs are common and lots of them are discussed in Joining Forces.

Let me be clear, Dr. Fradkin asked me to write the forward for this book, but I did not, nor will I ever, receive any monies for his book. That's not why I did it or why I'm sending this message to you. The reason I'm doing all of this is because I know the pain and the darkness and the shame that we as men can carry when these evil acts have been put upon us. But I also thank God. I know the peace and comfort that comes along with healing from the horror. Healing can start by reading this book.

Joining Forces is on sale now wherever books are sold.

Comments (page 3)

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  • Evagelist Ruth Byhalia, Ms.

    Dear Tyler, Thank you for recommending this book. I am a woman but I have heard a lot of stories personally from men and women a like. Most often then not their healing come from confronting it and telling other people,so that the devil gets a blackeye when it comes out the closet and get on frontstreet. You are a Marvelous man and people respect your opinion and they will read because of who you are. I pray God continually strenghten and BLESS you. Have you considered a free give-away to first 100 responses. I pray you have a BLESSED HOLIDAY SEASON Jesus Blood cover you always.

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  • Monica Canada

    Thanks Ty for letting me know of this book. I have a son and my greatest fear has been that I won't be able to protect him from a sexual predator when I'm not with him i.e. school, at a friend's house. I'll read the book and will keep the telltale signs in mind. Many blessings to you and yours and thank-you for thinking of us, your faithful readers.

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  • prophetess thelma francis 3312 curtis drive #103 suitland md 20746

    praise the lord tyler hope you didn't eat to much, happy thanksgiven,, in regurds to the book joining forces, I talk to kids and adults about this thing. it's heard to deal with people win you been through your self. yes I have . but I got to know jesus . there was a wall that I had build up , and there was no one to help because my family turnd on me. but look at me now, i'am god prophet, and I preach the gospel there is so much, I could say but I help as many as I can. god bless you tyler for what you do you are a god sent. talk to you soon.

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  • Hannah

    Hi Tyler, how do we in East Africa get a hold of this book? Can we buy it via the internet?

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  • Clara SD Colorado

    Mr. Perry, As usual, I am behind in reading my email. Nonetheless, I am thanking God that you have encouraged us to read the book, “Joining Forces” by Dr. Fradkin. I'm looking forward to reading it. Thank you so much!

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  • Evon sacramento

    Looks like your on a liquid diet..Where are you going to put the food if you go grocery shopping?. You know soda is bad for you, I'm sure it's just for the guest right? (smile you )I did see some milk, butter, beer, hot sauce. Where is the eggs, fruit and veggies? Hope you had a wonderful thanksgiving you ate plenty and laughed alot. You see the game? go redskins. Grinning. Only cali fan who loves the skins. great game. Waving from sunny calif. Hope you been getting some rest. Enjoy your weekend. Evon

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  • Aisha Hollywood, Ca

    Mr. Perry, I know the holidays is always a difficult time for you as you have shared with us. I want you to know you are truly a special person with extraordinary talents....that only you can offer to entertain and enlighten your viewing audience. Having said that, I pray you will do BETTER in taking care of yourself, physically, spiritually and emotionally. You will feel better if you take time to venture outside of your comfort zone and enjoy the company of family and friends. Since I consider you my dearest friend, you are alway welcomed to spend some time with my family. I promise you, you will be laughing for days. We are quit entertaining...still discovering our true talents. (smile) I will continue to pray for you. I am watching you now on the Eddie Murphy special on BET. You seem to be having a great time, and I pray that level of vitality rules an reigns in your life. God bless you, and I love you! BE BLESSED and HAPPY....PS Call me, I have insomnia...

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  • lakeia jonsnl midtown ATL

    Happy BLESSINGS & FAVOR SEASON........BEING. ALONE ALLOWS U 2 HAVE WHATEVER YOUR HEART DESIRES.......SORRY. UR MOM IS GONE BUT. I KNO THAT SHE IS. SMILING DOWN. FROM HEAVEN .....& IS SOOOOOO PROUD OF HER SON & ALL HIS ACCOMPLISHMENTS.......BUT THE GOOD PART....LOL....I KNO U HAVE A SEPERATE FRIDGE 4 UR FOOD...BLESSINGS. & FAVOR. OVER U ALWAYS.........

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  • Odessa Columbia, SC

    Saw the photo of your fridge. You need to get some food in it!!! Hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving. God Bless!!

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  • Patty Los Angeles, CA

    Hi Tyler, I hope that you are doing good. I just saw all the pictures you posted on FB and Twitter. The ones after thanksgiving. I like the X-Mas tree. The kitchen is beautiful. You do need to get some food, too many drinks. I hope you had a good one. I was OK, helping my mom and washing all the dishes. Had a day off today need to clean my room. I think about you often. Thank You for sharing the pictures. You are part of our life. I will say something about you, or say something Madea said. See one of your movies or stage plays. We love you, Tyler. I also wanted to let you know that we haven't seen Alex cross yet. It was out in a weekend that we didn't get a chance to see it yet. My daughter who loves you and reads all the James Patterson books that she can is still a little upset that we have not seen it yet. I think that is the fist time that we don't see one of your movies as soon as it comes out. Well Tyler just wanted you to know that here in L.A. you have two big fans. Me and my 12 year old daughter. We care about you very much. Hugs from L.A. God bless you always. Love Patty n Priscilla R.

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  • gillian henry trinidad and tobago

    tyler i greet you in the wonderful name of our LORD and savior JESUS CHRIST i will get straight to the point, there is some thing that need to be said to you, please do not ignore this it is very important to me and i pray to GOD also to you i believe you can see my number on the blocks that i filled out to send this, may GOD bless you talk to you soon sorry but this is my only means of communicating to you.

    Reply
    • gillian henry trinidad and tobago #1772377

      this is my number sorry i did not put it in it is 1- there is something that need to be said to you to GOD be the glory i cant write it on this message board thank you JESUS. GOD bless you tyler

      Reply
  • Belinda GA

    When I finally checked my email today I got chills when I saw this message. Both of my sons have been put in this very emotional and very unstabling situation. I have been trying to help them heal since I found out what happened, when it happened and who did it (both were very young boys). As adult men trying to move forward with their lives they have been struggling and I now unstand the frustration behind it all but in my efforts to help (as a mom and a woman whos never experience sexual abuse) I still feel hopeless. I was thinking this book would be great Christmas gifts but we need help now.......... Thanks Tyler for always being a ram in the bush! :-)

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