Tyler Perry.com


Move On!

Here’s a thought (I DON'T WANT YOU TO DO THIS, JUST THINK ABOUT IT). Get into the front seat of your car, then turn your body around. Knees on the front seat with your back on the steering wheel, your face looking toward the trunk. Stay in that position and try to drive the car forward. It’s impossible, right? If by some miracle you do manage to go forward I guarantee you won't get very far. If the car represents our lives then the way we are sitting in the driver's seat represents the way we approach it. It’s really hard to move on when you’re looking the wrong way. There is nothing wrong with the car... what is wrong is the position some of us are sitting in, meaning there is nothing wrong with your life, and you’re just facing the wrong direction.

There are many things that can cause you to be out of alignment with life, but instead of focusing on the many, I’d like to talk about one thing in particular... And that is GUILT.

I was talking to a friend of mine yesterday. He was telling me about all the guilt that he feels. Guilt that his marriage fell apart. Guilt that he doesn’t get to see his kids very often. Guilt that he’s not in a financial position to do more for them. Guilt over the mistakes he’s made in his past. Guilt over lots of money that he wasted doing the wrong things. So much guilt about everything.

I had to stop him and remind him of a few things. What I know about guilt is this: guilt is a tool that is used to destroy you. We all make mistakes. We all have fallen short. We have all disappointed someone, including ourselves at some point. Unfortunately, there is nothing you can do about it. It's done. Instead of beating yourself up about it, how about putting that same energy into making sure that it doesn’t happen again and healing anyone who may have been hurt by it?

You can’t let guilt win or consume you. You can’t let it take over your thoughts because if you do, you will start a downward spiral. It’s like this... guilt is the trick that makes you feel that you’re unworthy, and if you feel that you’re unworthy then you will feel that you don’t deserve any good thing to happen to you. And so, as a man thinks so is he. If you think you don’t deserve good things you will never have good things. And when things are falling apart you will feel guilty that they are falling apart. Do you see the cycle? There is no winning here. In order to be free and be lifted you must let go of the guilt or it will keep you bound.

How do you do that? Well, it’s a process, but you start by asking forgiveness of whomever you hurt, ask forgiveness of God, and most of all ask forgiveness of yourself. Although God forgives us most easily, we sometimes can't forgive ourselves. You can’t get to great things ahead if you're always looking behind you. It’s like trying to drive your car in that awkward position.

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  • Michelle Julia Kerekes Oshawa, Ontario CANADA

    Moving on...wise words. However, if I may add. A great many of "us" and I'm speaking collectively here are entrenched on the "Misery Channel"...and until these souls develop self awareness can they transition to the "Discovery Channel". For myself it's taken 40 years to finally be on the "Discovery Channel" and it's a beautiful and wonderful place. But I can remember all to clearly my life previously. And my words for you who are reading this is...love yourself. And forgive yourself. I truly believe we are all born good into this world. Life presents certain events that change us. But it is love that pure soul needing nourishment that will help you move forward. Meaning, when you love yourself it is then you can move forward to forgive yourself and all of those who have influenced you. And a true blessing is when you possess so much love inside you, you can forgive. That is a true miracle of GOD. That is GOD working through you and providing you further soul nourishment. You know what amazes me is how unaware we are about love and it's significant impacts on us as humans. And don't kid yourself I'm no 60's Flower Power Child. I'm a simple woman who is now aware. And it is LOVE we are ALL looking for. Yet it is the hardest thing in the world to find. I could go on...however...this is Tyler's page and I hope his words have opened your mind. And maybe my words have intrigued your thought process. BEATLES were right....ALL YOU NEED IS LOVE.

  • Yolanda Williams Marietta Ga

    Ouch wow you hit the nail on the head. We put ourselves in situation that we should not put ourselves in, and get mad at others. We need to get mad at ourselves, then forgive ourself. Thanks for the mirror.

  • LISA

    I've given this same advice many times myself. Like the car analogy. :) Of course, as with all advice a little easier to give than it is to take at times but you are so right. Satan wields guilt like a sword.... only we handed him the sword. God Bless

  • Loretta Columbia, SC

    Thank you Mr. Tyler Perry, I really needed that because I was doing this and I sit down and I said to myself. What are you doing Loretta? I blame myself for a lot of things but had to look at it what part they played in it. I forgave myself and them. I thank God everyday for what I have I would have never made it this far without God. He Sees The Best In Me Even When Everyone Else Around Me Sees The Worse In Me. Thanks to you Tyler I am going to throw GUILT out the door. The guilt I had is done I can not do anything about it now but Let Go and Let God. I know this part have nothing to do with your message but I have loss my hearing in one ear and I was so depress that I didn't see from crying I still have one ear to hear out of. People get fustrated because they have to repeat things to me and they don't talk to me anymore but rather they talk to me or not I have God and he listen to me I pray everyday that they fine away for me to hear good but if not I am still alive, healthy. God is Good. Thanks Tyler keep up the good work we are very bless to have you in our lives

  • JMosLuv STL

    Thank God for you, Tyler! I have been going through so much within the last month, and this thought from you today has helped me beyond words. Last night, I told my fiance' I was "done and I'm just tired". He, in his consoling way told me to stop having a pity party and live. Even though I know he meant well, it hurt even more the he thought it was a "pp". I don't normally leave anything on the message board, but today I have to say thank you. Thank you, for allowing God to use you to help others. My guilt and past mistakes have broke me down and I've allowed them to. But but the grace of God, I'm reclaiming what's mine! TODAY is my day! Much love, Tyler.

  • LOUVENIA STREET-BUIE woodbridge, va

    So So very True...never let GUILT consume the mind or heart for everything you experience has a purpose. THANK YOU FOR SHARING YOUR KNOWLEDGE AND GIFT

  • Maria Detroit, MI

    I SO needed to read this at this exact moment. Thank you!

  • Catherine St.Lucia

    Thank you very much for this message. It will go a long way in assisting me with supporting friends who suffer from guilt. I got a lot from it for myself as well. Keep up the good work and thanks once again.

  • Denise Santa Rosa, CA

    Thank you Tyler for all you wrote today. I had a similar conversation with a friend of mine who is in prison. He accepts his responsibility but also accepts responsibility that isn't his and I believe that isn't healthy. I shared with him what you wrote today in my letter to him. I know it takes time to stop blaming yourself when you make mistakes. I am a recovering addict with 25 years and have learned that moving forward is most important...not forgetting where you came from, so that you can guide and encourage others in their journey and be guided and encouraged by others having walked that same path, but letting go of the guilt of mistakes made because those mistakes make me the woman I am today..a loved daughter of God. (I just didn't know it before)

  • Temi LA

    When I first saw the title"Move on" in ur tweet, I was curious. You are so true as always With this - just b4 I read ds, I was beating myself over with guilt of not visiting my uncle Who just left mortality for immortality- as I shd have in the last 5 months. This is 4 me a word in season. Learnt my lessons and am facing forward. Gracias!

  • Portia Johannesburg, South Africa

    God bless you Tyler, thanks for such an inspirational message.

  • Matthew Henderson Adirondacks, NY

    Tyler, I would simply like to say "Thank you" for what you have written here. Please keep shining a light so that others may be able to find you in the dark.

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