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I Still Miss You

I woke up this morning missing you like you'll never know. I dream about you. Sometimes when I'm alone I can hear your laughter fill the room. It was such a distinct laugh. It meant that everything was right in the world. On Sunday I would watch you singing your heart out in the choir, shouting about how good our God is. We didn't tell the preacher that on Friday night you were singing down-home blues at the top of your lungs, sipping your Hennessy. You loved the blues. You loved playing tonk till midnight in the projects. That was fun you'd say... for you. I wanted to go to bed :-)

I can almost hear you singing right now. Z.Z. Hill was your favorite blues singer. I can feel you from when you would hug me so tight and tell me, "everything is gonn be alright" and how much you loved me. I remember when you were mad at me. That never lasted long. Every year on my birthday you would call me and sing the Happy Birthday song to me. I would call you and ask if you needed anything, anything at all, and you would say, "I need you to be happy".

I don't know if I could have truly expressed how proud I was of you, but I was so proud of you. I remember you saying, "you know I did the best I could with you..." And yes, I know that. I know that you loved me like no other on this earth. Your best was more than good enough. IT WAS!

And I loved you. I still love you so much. I know I was your hope and I know I am your dream. I know that you couldn't go on anymore. I know your body was letting you down although you wanted to stay for us. I'm glad you have no more pain but I have pain now missing you every day. It's been almost four years now, so it's getting easier. Knowing you're with our God helps me get through.

I love and miss you every day. I'm OK now. Standing on my own. Holding you in my heart.

I love you mamma and I always will.

W. Maxine Perry
1945-2009

If you're reading this, tell them you love them before it's too late.

Comments (page 14)

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  • Marletta Priscilla Fomby US

    Hey Ty, That was perfectly self expressed and I received it as such.

    Reply
  • Gayla Gray Austin

    It's been almost two years for me and I make it a point to share with those who are blessed to have living parents period. For years I resented my Mom for not being able to tell me who my Father was...what a waste ....I was so concerned about trying to be understood, that I had no understanding of my Mothers painful past. One morning at a Seattle clinic ....total silence filled the room, I could hear my heart beating. Why was my Mother so adamant about me being here ? The door swings open and a 5 ft. female Doctor from Russia enters the room with a humble but confident spirit. My Mothers then say's, ' Can you tell her what you told me.'? For 5 seconds I heard nothing as the Doctor tried to explain my Mom's condition...then she said it...it was a termination date of 5 years. My body went numb and I pretended to be unaffected by the news. I told the Doctor thanks as she left the exam room. From that day on, all the resentment, all the why me's were instantly gone. Self-centeredness no longer played a part in my life. All that mattered was the time left to enjoy the Woman who gave me life. God gave me a gift...her name was Wilhelmina Yvonne White 1

    Reply
  • Derrick Chattanooga Tennessee

    Good Evening Tyler. That was absolutely beautiful. I thank GOD for my mama. I love and cherish her every moment. Thank you for this. This poem really keeps things in perspective. Thank You my brother. And yes I am man enough to tell you that I love you. Thank God for our mamas and Thank You Tyler Perry. God Bless You! Forever a fan. Derrick

    Reply
  • Latonja Perris

    Tyler, That is a nice poem that your mother/you wrote. It is letting you know how much you miss your mother and how much she misses you. Love it.

    Reply
  • patricia

    I AM HAPPY FOR YOU!

    Reply
  • Nichole Duncanville, TX

    I definitely can relate to the heart felt pain you're going through. I lost my mom in 2007 and sometimes it seems like only yesterday we were laughing and talking. My mother died suddenly from a brain aneurysm. I was going over her house to visit her and instead I found her lifeless body. That was the most devastating day of my life. My mom was my best friend and it's been 6 years later, I'm still having a tough time. So my heart goes out to you. The last conversation I had with my mom was about her meeting you and I told her that the next Play you had in Dallas I promised I would take her, little did I know she would be gone the next day. Just know our mothers are watching over us.

    Reply
  • Ethel Maplewood

    It was 4 years in Feb since my mom passed and it gets harder everyday. She was my rock and my best friend. Mom I miss you and love you very much.

    Reply
  • Tasha

    Just got your email....you are so beautiful. May the God of all comfort, comfort you.(2 Cor. 1:3,4) The way you have comforted us through years of pain to the joy and laughter of the real good times to last a lifetime. To the man I can only know like this..it is enough because you give yourself freely. To be your friend...we are thankful...you are not just simply amazing...you just ARE. I love you, Tyler. May you find your truth.

    Reply
  • Angie Detroit

    WOW is all I can say, It was 4 years ago yesterday that my mom went to be with the Lord. I feel you Tyler when you give us a mental picture of your mom, that's so real! See my mom loved ZZ Hill too but she was really a Luther fan, she played bingo, keno, you name it she played it! She didn't go to church that much but one Sunday she surprised my family when she showed up to be baptized, that was so amazing! I miss her so much too but I cherish every memory of her and I also tell people you only get one. It makes no sense to me when I hear people talk about their mother's in a negative way. Thank you Tyler for allowing this platform for people to express themselves. Be blessed

    Reply
  • Lungi South Africa Johannesburg

    I'm sorry for your loss, it's your mom pain takes time to heal imfact I don't think it ever goes away but it does get better with time. My mom died in 2007 I still have a lot of should have's things I think I should have done differently. I feel my family's pain. God has been my strenght and in your beautiful letter I'm taking the relief that she isn't in pain and is with God. I see her smile everyday, n still hear n see her while cooking and singing. My peeps, Tyler is so right love and cherish them while they around.

    Reply
  • Cindy ATL

    Tyler, I feel your pain.I lost my mother in 2004. I don't think if people haven't lost a mother they dont understand what it's like to loose your best friend. But know this Tyler, God said he wouldn't leave us comfortless. I believe in my heart we have angels around us constantly.(moma) I know moma isis looking doamwn,on the right side of his throne saying, look at my son whom I am well pleased. You have an earthly friend in me if you ever need to talk. May God continue to give you peace and comfort.

    Reply
  • Barbara Snellville Ga

    I know the feeling oh too well..my mom passed away 1/19/2009..that was beautifully said..

    Reply
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